the sun too embarrassed
--for Mike


i heard when johnny cash died
that dylan said he was
the north star
that you could guide your
ship by

i remember you shifting
thru the gears of

yr midnight green

65 chevelle
mickey thompson mags
on the way to mugs up
to see yr best girl

and how you always
did the right thing
playing it safe
never taking risks
never going head on
into that goodnight 

i remember how
multiple wives
& roommates each

altered your dna
just enough
before

cleaning you out 

how each one chipped
away at you

until
there was only dust 

i can tell you
it was good weather
for a funeral
the sun
too embarrassed
to show its face

but it is
never a good day 

except for those
that cashed in
and stood
graveside
blank faced
with hands in their pockets

and you know
that girl from mugs up
was the only one to speak
when asked for comments
she broke the quiet awkwardness
said you had the best smile
and stopped left it at that
but i knew there was more
that wasn't said

hiding behind sunglasses
and fighting tears 

i remembered the way
you laughed the most

walking to the car
when everyone
promised to keep
in touch
i repeated
in my head
hoping you could hear

growing up
you
were my
johnny cash


in 1975
before the opioid crisis response act
of 2018


greg

got

addicted
to
methadone

after
he
lied
about
being
hooked
on
heroin

the
clinic
gave
it
away
daily

on
fridays
you
got
a
weekend
supply

he'd
shoot
it
up
right
there
sitting
in
his
mom's
98

nodding
off
like
death
dragging
a
crippled
foot

outside
an
old
woman
pulled
a
grocery
cart
up
the
paseo
like
he
wasn't
even
there



Scot Young herds goats on an Ozark ridge top farm with the woman of his dreams. He is the editor at the Rusty Truck and is widely published both online and in print.